Dear Santa

I've been good this year. Not saintly, mind you, but good. My parenting hasn't messed up the Spawn too badly, I think. I've been kind to animals and little old ladies. I've been kind to my Better Half too, and he certainly deserves it. So this is my Christmas wish list.

On Christmas, I want to sleep until I wake up. I want to perform my morning ablutions in peace and with the door shut, just for fun. I want to walk to the kitchen without having to dodge random toys (which weren't there the night before!), articles of clothing, or piles of cat vomit. I want to cook a nice breakfast and have everyone eat it, not just me. There's more, but I'll stop there.

If you can manage all this, you might throw in cheap cold fusion too.

Thank you.